Since Grandma Kitty was down for the count this week after having kidney stone surgery, Grandma Debbie was taking care of you. But Grandpa Joe needed to take her van to work in the afternoon, so she didn’t have any way to take you to therapy on Thursday. I ended up taking you there, and I got to see how much progress you’ve been making.
Not only did I learn that you can throw a ball overhand, but I got to see you trace the template of a heart with a pencil. Your occupational therapist made the line darker and thicker with a marker so you had a better guide to cut. You cut out the whole heart, all by yourself! It wasn’t perfect, of course, but it was completely recognizable as a heart!
Then your therapist used a pencil to write the words “I love you” on the heart. You traced the letters with a marker. It’s legible! I’m so proud of you. You got to take it home.
You decided you wanted to make another heart this morning, because you wanted it to say “I love you too.” I had to draw the heart freehand, which you were keen to point out had “bigger bumps” than the first heart. But you cut it out like a champ with only a little more trouble than you had at therapy. I think your therapist might have helped you straighten the paper out as you were cutting, but I made sure you did this one all by yourself. It’s another perfectly recognizable heart. I wrote the words in pencil, and you traced them with marker. You new (green) heart looks great!
Your scissor skills and your tracing have come a long way. I’m so proud of you.
Love,
Mommy
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Guess who’s going to Disney World in Orlando, Florida next week? That’s right, this mom! (And dad and son.) We’re talking part in the Disney Social Media Moms Celebration – which is so completely awesome!
I had little over a month to prepare when I got my invitation in early January. Within one hour of receiving the invitation, I’d IMed Tom at work, asked him if he could get the time off – and if we could afford it – and I completed my conference registration and booked our flights! I’m usually much more of a planner, so this whole spur-of-the-moment Disney vacation is very unlike me!
I got a little excited. Everyone on Twitter was trying to come up with a suitable hashtag for discussing the event. I would like to proudly say that I came up with #DisneySMMoms. And apparently Disney World approved, because they created an official @DisneySMMoms Twitter account! (You’re welcome, guys!) I also started the unofficial Disney Social Media Moms Facebook Group for conference attendees.
So anyway…
I haven’t been to Disney World since the summer after the 8th grade with my best friend Brie. Tom hasn’t been to Disney World in so long that he doesn’t even remember when it was. So much has changed! This will be TJ’s first trip on an airplane and his first time at Disney World. How exciting is that?
We’ve got our Disney World park maps and our Disney’s Magical Express information for the shuttle ride to the hotel. I just need to do a whole bunch of laundry this weekend so we can get packed! (I made a packing list last week.)
And I vow to get at least some of the mommy blogger contingent together for a photo with Jack Sparrow while we’re there.
Tom and I had a meeting with TJ’s preschool teachers this morning. We were supposed to be discussing the results of the speech evaluation and the Functional Behavior Assessment (FBA) they conducted with him after the Christmas break. There had been an informational parents night last week about the transition to kindergarten. I thought it would be a “Yay! Your kid’s going to kindergarten!” type of meeting. I felt like the air was sucked out of my lungs when they started talking about advocating for your child during the transition from the Committee on Preschool Special Education (CPSE) to the Committee on Special Education (CSE) and they started talking about independent classrooms and such. I spent most of the meeting trying not to cry, even though I knew that TJ would only need a little extra help, and not the drastic measures that some of the other parents were looking at.
So I got up early for the meeting this morning, and I know I’m going to have to lie back down at some point. I slept terribly last night. TJ kept saying that we were bringing him to school late, but it was actually half an hour early. He was a little confused to be the only kid there when we arrived, but he was happy to have the full run of the toys in the classroom while one of his teacher’s from last year supervised. We were taken into a smaller classroom.
Instead of just meeting with TJ’s academic teacher, Ms. Maryellen, we met with her and three others that included the special education teacher in his classroom, the school speech therapist, and one of the administrators.
“This is a good news meeting,” Maryellen said.
The speech therapist did two evaluations with TJ. On the first, he scored above average on all but one section. He scored average on the “following directions” section. We already knew that his grammar and sentence structure was impeccable, though. On the pragmatic language assessment, which is what the developmental behavioral pediatrician had requested last year, he scored a 75. A score of 68 or lower indicates that a child is “at risk” and would require services. So no speech therapy.
Ms. Karen, the special education teacher in his classroom, did his FBA across four different days. He had the most trouble on the Wednesday after Christmas break, requiring more redirection during circle time and such, but the rest of the days were fine. They do still have some minor concerns about some of his social skills, but nothing that warrants special education services. He could still improve on working independently and not asking for help before he tries something, but he’s come a long way with his rigidity and coughing to avoid answering questions.
They asked about his occupational therapy and physical therapy, and we told them that he was testing out of those services, but they’ll keep him on until June. Tom mentioned that we still have concerns about his handwriting and drawing shapes, but apparently his inability to draw distinct shapes is typical. Most 4-year-olds struggle with corners and straight lines, so we shouldn’t worry that his triangles and squares look just like his circles. I was using drawings done by his cousin Kyle, who is five months older, as my benchmark. We’ve seen Kyle’s pictures of a praying mantis trying to eat a ladybug and a detailed map of the solar system… I guess Kyle is just way ahead of his time when it comes to putting pen to paper. TJ isn’t behind.
So TJ will enter kindergarten without being identified as a special education student. He’ll be going into a normal kindergarten classroom without being pulled out for speech therapy, occupational therapy, or physical therapy. Apparently he won’t even qualify for the afternoon program with the social skills group that would give him a whole day of school instead of a half day, which was something described to us at the parents night meeting last week.
The teachers suggested that we inform his occupational therapist that we’d like her to focus more on his handwriting while he still gets services. They also told us that it is completely up to us as to whether or not we tell his kindergarten teacher he has Asperger’s Syndrome. We could give her a heads up or we could see how it goes. Either way, they recommended we tell the teacher to call us right away if he seems to have any problems in class, and not wait to see what happens. I’m leaning toward telling his kindergarten teacher about his diagnosis, briefing her on his rigidity and how he is unwilling to attempt things without asking for help, but letting her know that I do expect him to succeed in school because he truly loves learning.
I know he’s made a lot of progress this year, and his teachers said that the month of March is usually quite magical for 4-year-olds, where they all bloom and shine more than ever. I just hope that the novelty of kindergarten isn’t too high a hurdle for him to overcome with his challenges-that-don’t-require-special-services. It will be much harder to go back in and ask for services from scratch than it would be to continue them from preschool.
But this was good news, and I should try not to worry so much about the what ifs. My son is testing out of special education. He’s not going to start public school with a label.
You’re in rare form today. Full of energy. You’ve had a terrible barking cough all week long, and you’ve mostly been acting like you’re sick. But today you seem to be feeling much better. Which is good. You’re in a good mood, but you just have no off button. It’s still mid-afternoon, and I’m completely spent. You’ve sucked all the life out of me already today. I was tiredd even before we got Daddy out of bed. You were raring to go when we went to lunch with Grandma Debbie, Grandpa Joe, and Great-Grandma. And you were still going strong when we went grocery shopping at Price Chopper.
At this point, I’m very grateful that you’ve also been behaving. If you were this full of energy and feeling bold, we would’ve had a lot of problems. Thank you for being a good boy even though you’ve run me ragged.
Love,
Mommy
Wanna play? Here’s how to participate in Dear Kid Saturday:
1. Write your own Dear Kid letter on your blog.
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I get disappointed sometimes when I look at some of the drawings your cousin Kyle sends us of a praying mantis trying to eat a ladybug, or something else similarly complicated. We have a hard time getting you to draw a recognizable triangle, and your OT says you’re not going to qualify for further services ppast the end of the school year. I don’t understand how that’s possible, but apparently I don’t have a say in the matter.
So the other night, I asked you to draw a picture of yourself, and I drew a stick figure to show you the basic shapes you would need to draw it. I was so proud of the results that I interviewed you about it on video:
I did not put hair on the stick figure I drew for you as a model. You decided to add the hair all by yourself. You said it was “just like Steve from Blue’s Clues.” I like how you placed your hair so precisely to show it sticking up.
Now that I know that drawing specific figures is not a benchmark for occupational therapy, we’re going to start working on it more at home. I’m going to teach you how to draw dogs and cats and all sorts of things.
Love,
Mommy
Wanna play? Here’s how to participate in Dear Kid Saturday:
1. Write your own Dear Kid letter on your blog.
2. Sign the MckLinky below with your name or blog name and the link to your Dear Kid post – the specific post URL, not the homepage of your blog.
Last year, we got the diagnosis that confirmed my suspicions concerning TJ’s behavior and mannerisms. Asperger Syndrome. (It doesn’t officially have an apostrophe in there, but so many people use it that I think it’s now accepted colloquially as Asperger’s Syndrome.) He’s on the autism spectrum, albeit the high functioning end. Like any parent of a child with Asperger’s, I read up a lot on the subject, learned as much as I could, and I’m using it to fight for him in the school system.
I’ve also learned a bit more about myself. Namely, that I have Asperger Syndrome, too. I’m not going to seek an official medical diagnosis. I don’t need to be a card-carrying member of the club when I already know the secret handshake. But all of my research done on my son’s behalf… my childhood suddenly made much more sense. My complete lack of fashion sense. How I could never be called graceful, and I always look awkward dancing. My penchant for obsessing over things (often computer-related) annd for ruminating about things that really don’t matter. How I really wanted to do the whole psychology thing – I even got my Master’s degree in it – but I can’t read people with any sort of accuracy. The picky eating. The anxiety. The social awkwardness. And so on…
So here I am, trying to raise my son so that he can have a more normal childhood than I had. No one knew what Asperger Syndrome was when I was growing up. I was just the weird girl with the thick glasses who wore pants with elastic waistbands and participated in the gifted & talented program. I want more for TJ than that.
It’s great to see you playing with your cousin Avery now that Uncle Joe and Aunt Meghan were finally able to made it up to visit. You refer to her as “Baby Avery” every time you say her name it’s very cute.
The devastating earthquake in Haiti has injured and killed tens of thousands of people, leaving even the President of Haiti homeless. Charitable organizations across the globe need our help to send aid to the people of Haiti, but donation fatigue can get even the most kind-hearted of us down.
You’ve heard of dining out for a cause, but here’s something different… PLAY for a cause! You may remember how awesome WorldWinner was for sponsoring me at the Type-A Mom Conference in September 2009. Well, they’ve got their own fundraising effort underway to raise money for earthquake relief.
I’m asking for a silly thing. If you’re on Twitter, you’ve surely heard of the Shorty Awards by now. I don’t qualify for any of the official categories, in my opinion. But there are unofficial catetgories, and I need your votes in the #MILT category…